Doodle Charcuterie

Have they stopped breeding real dogs? Oh is that a sheepdog? Wait don’t tell me it’s

a sheepdoodle. Every dog’s a doodle these days; golden doodle, Yorkie doodle, noodle doodle. “They’re hypoallergenic and they don’t shed” Yea, because they’re not dogs. Why don’t you just buy a hook rug. You could pet that too and it won’t shed and it’s about as much fun as a doodle dog. Doodles are like empty beanbags that are mass produced in a depressed factory town in Pennsylvania. They come off the assembly line with the same stupid expression like they’re embarressed. They should be embaressed- they have no organs. I think they should make kid doodles. Jimmy doodle, Tammy doodle. They’re great. They don’t talk or shed. We just run em through the sprinkler once a week and they’re good to go.